Hey guys
Sorry this post is coming a few days later than expected but I didn't really think about it until just now. Any who, I have been thinking about how I have been dealing with the whole lupus elephant in the room and the truth is, I haven't. Not really.
Its just that I kind of swept it under the rug and yeah people know I was diagnosed with it but its just not something I like to talk about. Now, I think that I am in a place where I can and am willing to talk about it to people who want to know.
I found a website, http://www.cure4lupus.org/ actually I am not sure if I found it or if it was referred to me by my cousin, either way it really helped me with accepting this disease. I am looking through these links and realize in the scheme of things I got the most common type of lupus.
Did you know that the singer Seal got the scars on his face from a childhood battle with Discoid Lupus. All this time I thought that it was from a motorcycle accident. There was a whole list of celebrities with Lupus some alive, some dead but there are more people with this disease than I thought there were.
What it boils down to for me is that, no I am not in anyway satisfied with my life right now, but hopefully I will find a place that I fit and can start to take strides in becoming independent and building a life of my own. Maybe because of the fact that I am owning Lupus it will no longer own me.
Love, peace and hairgrease...
Court
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Saturday, July 2, 2011
First of many...
It is quarter to six and wanna know what I have done today? Well, I have been watching a Ghost Whisperer marathon on TV, that and checked my email. I should feel bad but I really don't seeing how I cleaned and rearranged my room yesterday. I think I am like my mom in the fact that I feel like I should be doing something. Still a zero on the job front, and no that doesn't mean I want to up and get a 9-5 job outside of the house but the online jobs I have looked into are a sham. I would like to feel like I have some sort of purpose in the world and not just a 25 year old with no job experience and a high school degree. That's not to say that my life sucks and woe is me or anything, I have a pretty good life if I do say so myself. I would just like to earn more than 80 bucks every two weeks and feel like my 14 year old siblings have more of a life than I do. Think I might start writing again, problem is they say write what you know and I what I know is pretty depressing sometimes. I guess today is my dark and gloomy day, the day I choose to look at whats lacking (in my opinion) in my life.
Tomorrow will be better...
Courtney
Tomorrow will be better...
Courtney
Something New...
Hey guys,
So starting this month I am gonna try to post something at least every Saturday. This blog is gonna start to be used more as my journal than anything else. Some posts may be short and sweet while others my be long and contemplative, so bare with me as I sort through my thoughts and feelings.
Love you all...
Courtney
So starting this month I am gonna try to post something at least every Saturday. This blog is gonna start to be used more as my journal than anything else. Some posts may be short and sweet while others my be long and contemplative, so bare with me as I sort through my thoughts and feelings.
Love you all...
Courtney
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
I'M BACK....for the moment at least
So, I know that I say this everytime I update but I'm sorry I took so long to update. I'll give no excuses because I have none so lets just get to it, shall we?
Okay so in my last post I was talking about marijuana use and tattoos, well I have an update to offer on that front. Yesterday I went to see my rheumatologist and I can say with certainty that I made his monotonus day, rather interesting.
The appointment was going as it normally does, he took my blood pressure, asked if I needed any new prescriptions, and went over my lab results with me. They are normal just in case you were wondering, my lupus is undercontrol at the moment. Then I threw him for a loop, let me just say that this conversation went WAY better in my head than it did in real life.
I am sitting looking at the many medical posters on the wall and I blurt out, "WOULD IT BE SAFE TO GET A TATTOO?"
The doctor startles and whips his head around, wide eyed and says, "Umm..."
Cue the rambling, I start to relay the conversation I had with my mother on sunday. Telling him how my mother is all against it and how I tried unsuccessfully to win the argument that it would be fine and he is still looking at me like I have a third eye on my forehead. Finally he holds up his hands and I stop mid sentence and he chuckles, "Hold off on the tattoo until I take you off of Cellcept and make sure if you do get one to watch it closely because if it was to get infected, that would be really bad."
I nod and he continues to right notes in his little notepad and I blurt out, "What about weed?"
He chokes on his spit and coughs a bit and says, "Umm, just say no? I am not understanding the question?"
"Well I read online somewhere that this guy who has lupus says that marijuana is an immuno suppressant so it shouold work the same as a steriod does, so..." I say like he should automatically know all this information.
You know what he does next? There is a beat of silence, he blinks at me and starts to giggle and that grows into chuckles and then he starts in with this belly laugh/snort thing. It was the oddest thing and I am looking at him like, seriously? Is he really laughing in my face? I mean this goes on for like 3 minutes and his face is beet red and I just watch, amazed that this man is laughing at me. Then he looks at me and composes himself and says. "No, just no, firstly marijuana is still illegal in VA and even if it was I wouldnt prescribe medicinal marijuana to you. Secondly, even if that is true, you are still smoking and it would affect your liver. So no, I would not take you off of prednisone and put you on medicinal marijuana. Nice try though." Then he starts in with the chuckling. Stands up, wishes me a good summer and tells me he wants to see me in 4 months.
He was still laughing when I left his office!! The nerve!!
Thanks Dr. Bahadori....
So it looks like we have to go back to the drawing board Aunt Brenda. No trippy days in the cut for me in the near future!!
Also, Keisha if you are reading this, I am wanted to reiterate that I would be honored if you walked for me in the Lupus walk, if and only IF your doctor says its okay and you feel up to it.
No I am not offended in the least, lets take it a step at a time, yes?
Love, peace and hair grease...
Courtney
Okay so in my last post I was talking about marijuana use and tattoos, well I have an update to offer on that front. Yesterday I went to see my rheumatologist and I can say with certainty that I made his monotonus day, rather interesting.
The appointment was going as it normally does, he took my blood pressure, asked if I needed any new prescriptions, and went over my lab results with me. They are normal just in case you were wondering, my lupus is undercontrol at the moment. Then I threw him for a loop, let me just say that this conversation went WAY better in my head than it did in real life.
I am sitting looking at the many medical posters on the wall and I blurt out, "WOULD IT BE SAFE TO GET A TATTOO?"
The doctor startles and whips his head around, wide eyed and says, "Umm..."
Cue the rambling, I start to relay the conversation I had with my mother on sunday. Telling him how my mother is all against it and how I tried unsuccessfully to win the argument that it would be fine and he is still looking at me like I have a third eye on my forehead. Finally he holds up his hands and I stop mid sentence and he chuckles, "Hold off on the tattoo until I take you off of Cellcept and make sure if you do get one to watch it closely because if it was to get infected, that would be really bad."
I nod and he continues to right notes in his little notepad and I blurt out, "What about weed?"
He chokes on his spit and coughs a bit and says, "Umm, just say no? I am not understanding the question?"
"Well I read online somewhere that this guy who has lupus says that marijuana is an immuno suppressant so it shouold work the same as a steriod does, so..." I say like he should automatically know all this information.
You know what he does next? There is a beat of silence, he blinks at me and starts to giggle and that grows into chuckles and then he starts in with this belly laugh/snort thing. It was the oddest thing and I am looking at him like, seriously? Is he really laughing in my face? I mean this goes on for like 3 minutes and his face is beet red and I just watch, amazed that this man is laughing at me. Then he looks at me and composes himself and says. "No, just no, firstly marijuana is still illegal in VA and even if it was I wouldnt prescribe medicinal marijuana to you. Secondly, even if that is true, you are still smoking and it would affect your liver. So no, I would not take you off of prednisone and put you on medicinal marijuana. Nice try though." Then he starts in with the chuckling. Stands up, wishes me a good summer and tells me he wants to see me in 4 months.
He was still laughing when I left his office!! The nerve!!
Thanks Dr. Bahadori....
So it looks like we have to go back to the drawing board Aunt Brenda. No trippy days in the cut for me in the near future!!
Also, Keisha if you are reading this, I am wanted to reiterate that I would be honored if you walked for me in the Lupus walk, if and only IF your doctor says its okay and you feel up to it.
No I am not offended in the least, lets take it a step at a time, yes?
Love, peace and hair grease...
Courtney
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